so...

I'm back from Berlin! The test went well, i think.. I was so nervous I hardly ate anything the whole ay wednesday. I'm really glad it's over, but I think my body is really tired from all the stress. i feel like I'm just so tired all the time...

Of course the univeristy made a mistake with the papers and everybody has to do the oral examination. So I'm leaving again on wednesday for Berlin, I get my results ( actually I just get to see if I passed or not the written examination) and I then get my appointment for the oral examination, which is held either on thursday or friday.

It's really frustrating to not know until the last minute if I passed or not ( I think I did well, but you never know how they correct...) And I get my appointment at the last minute...


I feel like every single thing is so stressful, tiring and uncertain, and then when I finally accomplish it, I am totally relieved for like 2 or 3 hours, maybe half a day, and then I feel the anxiety starting to rise again thinking about how I have to organize my shit for the next step. For example I was really happy after my written test on thursday, well actually almost ecstatic and then I thought " Oh my god, now i have to find a connection for berlin for next week, find somewhere I can sleep for 2 or 3 nights... prepare for the other examination. Then, when it s going to be done, I have to buy governments medical insurance for students, then I have to register with the city, then I have to obtain my visa, then I get to officially register at the university... And we'll be moving short of 2 weeks from now, then I'll have to figure out how I choose my courses for this semester, THEN find a job (Oh my GOD!)than actually start to work with german people.

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

If I survive this, and get to the point where I'm registered for my classes, got a job and all, lets say by end of october/beginning november, I will officially proclaim myself super goddess of the world.